There are few things more important than you identify yourself. Are you a proud parent of an honor student? Is there a particular style of clothes you prefer to wear? Is there a sport or activity that is special and worthy of your time?

All of these things help identify you as a person, but when you try to put a group of people together, it is even more difficult. How does an entire team of people sum up their identity into a team name?

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Sports teams have mascots. A bowling team is a bit small to take on the status of a mascot. But without a cute mascot, teams need a common theme to tie the different members together.

Should the name be something describing the players' association with each other? If all players work at the same company, the name may be ‘Bob’s Plumbing’. It could be that Bob’s Plumbing is the sponsor, the name could be ‘Bob’s Plumbing Bowlers’. What of the bowlers who have come together through a shared cause? Naming a team ‘Cancer Sucks’ pretty much tells the story right there.

What about random people thrown together because they wanted to bowl, but didn’t know anyone else? How does that team pull together and name the team in a sort of mission statement?

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As a new reluctant captain of a bowling team, there are very few perks. Naming the team may be the only bright spot of the role. Now, to pick a winner.

Suggestions from listeners include Booze Bowlers, Spaceballs the Bowling Team, or My Drinking Team Has a Bowling Problem. Some favorites of co-workers include Bowl Movements, Splits for Brains, and Balls of Fury. Trying to tie into an Idaho theme gets results like Idabowl or Tater Baters. There are always names that don’t refer to bowling, but convey a message or feeling; Your Mom, Feeling Thorny, or Yellow-Brick Toad.

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So far, the lead name is Slop Counts, a bowling reference that identifies the core of the group. We aren’t that good and there is a handicap for a reason.

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