The Best ID, WA, UT Valentine's Day Meal Out For Cheap-Ass Men

Valentine's Day is almost upon us. If you haven't made reservations yet, guys, well, you've screwed up royally once again. I was like you once.

This 24-hour lovers' window is an annual opportunity to show just how much people value their relationships. The problem for a lot of men is that it falls just 44 days after Christmas, and less than 10 days after the Super Bowl and National Wedding Ring Day (February 3), which means money is tight for many hardworking men.

What if I told you there was a way to wrap up an evening out with your lady/man on Valentine's Day (February 14) for less than $70, including a tip? You can thank me later.

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Credit: Greg Jannetta

The Olive Garden's Combo Of Never-Ending Dipping Sauces For Breadsticks Appetizer And The Fan Favorites (split, of course) Means You Don't Have To Spend More Than $20 On Your Valentine's Day Date For Dinner

The solution to this Valentine's Day spending dilemma can be found by stealing a page from Roy Munsen's book of hard knocks. If you want to really spoil your lady/man friend, then allow them to choose from the assortment of house wines that ring in around $8 a glass.

This Olive Garden meal for 2 costs $30. A second glass of wine is optional. Credit: Greg Jannetta

Make the local Idaho Olive Garden your new home for romance, and a bill that won't have you asking your aging mother to Venmo you the next day.

The Olive Garden also plays romantic, Italian slow jams from artists like Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin at no extra charge, so you could slide your chair back and have a dance with your special date while kids cough and sneeze and adults stuff breadsticks down their throats all around you.

(Warning: Video contains a couple of naughty words)

Happy Valentine's Day! And guys, this formula assures you're getting lucky Saturday night. If not, he/she wasn't meant for you.